The year in review

My year this year has been crazy at least. We have had good times and some really bad times.

The year started out with JT still in the hospital but, hope that he would come home by February. February we learned that he needed a liver and small bowel transplant. March found out he needed his heart fixed or he wouldn’t be able to get the transplant. April found out he wouldn’t be able to get his heart fixed. Which meant no liver/small bowel transplant. May we lost him. June – December we have grieved and remembered and laughed and cryed.

In February, I spent the first full night with my son taking care of him. He was 6 months old at the time. We had a great time. I got real smiles. He was happy to have me. We spent some quality one on one time. I learned he loved CNN and the Temptations. I also learned more of what made him unhappy and what made him happy. Learned how calm and collected he was. He could make it through procedures and not blink an eye like he was bored with it all. He learned also during this time how to reach out and play with things. I also learned just how much he totally hated being naked. He loved to be dressed and bundled tight. I had to teach the nursing staff how to bundle him. This is when we were on the gastrointestinal unit at Cincy Children’s.

When we found out that it was just a matter of time. I tried to squeeze in every little thing that I could so that he could experience things that we take for granite. The whole time though I was rallying for him. He had swung in a swing, played with toys, been read to talked to played with and most importantly, Loved.

He got his first bottle, ate dum dum pops, (he loved the blue ones), went outside and experienced real air.
He walked around in the buggy through the NICU and met the other babies. He rode in the buggy that they go home in with Retta pushing him. He tasted pickles, and grapes. We never did get the ice cream but, hey you can’t have everything now can you?

We read him the Christmas story and he learned about Jesus and what he did for us. This way when he met him he would know who he was. I told him about heaven and how gloriously pretty that is was. And how he would love being there able to breathe and eat and be with out any tubes and not have to be weighed or take a bath anymore. I think he loved that part the best.

We were also approved to take him home for a couple of hours. This helped us see a doctor who we thought really didn’t care, really cared alot. He fought for us, got it approved, and well, it was too late, but, that is ok. At least we tried. And that is the important part. We didn’t give up. Even though we really didn’t know how much time we had left.

This year, I learned how to change an ostomy bag, how to drain it. How to stop bleeding. Learned all about cc’s.

Learned that nurses are people too. Even though at first you don’t think they are. They have emotions, feeling, and are very protective of “their” babies.

Know the make up of a bag of tpn. could tell if an iv was blown, could tell if my son needed blood just by his color and his demeanor.

So, I have learned alot this year also.

I learned alot about myself and faith this year too. Stuff I had never known. I also learned I have a lot of friends out there. I got to meet two of them at his funeral. It was awesome to meet them, I just wished that it wasn’t during those circumstances and I would have been able to talk with them and visit more and been more me and not just trying to hold it together long enough until I got home. But, I am sure there will be other times.

So, there was my year, not much to tell from the other family because well, really my life centered around JT and I do believe it still is for the most part. I am trying to get back into the routine of being here for my children. Being a wife and a mother. It is taking some time but, I feel we are making progress. Although it is little progress, it is still progress after all.

So, that would be my year in review.

So much to do today

Today, I have so much to do. I am rearranging things and making me a sewing area. Cleaning my bedroom. I stuffed things in there when company came. Stacey has a dentist appt. That is going to take forever. I hope I can find a good book at the library. I have my bed stuff in the dryer getting ready to go on my bed and then I am spending 15 minutes throughout the day in there. If I spend longer than I get overwhelmed. The kitchen is done. Woo hoo. I have mass amounts of laundry to get done. Mt. Washmore just keeps sneaking up on me. Then, I have a few errands to run after Stacey gets out of the dentist. I know I have to take Asha with me so, maybe she will be a little company. I hope so anyway. I then have to go to Walmart and find fabric. I have a few projects going on and I can’t wait to get to them. I also found a few patterns on free patterns.com that I want to try. Simple easy baby bibs so they say anyway. I am going to try my hand at making them though. I am going to send a few to my cousin if it works out. They look easy enough that once I figure it out I can show the girls and they can make them also. I am trying to find us a mutual hobby. Something that we can all do together and enjoy it and work as a team. We are already doing that with making the quilts but, I would like to expand their horizons so to speak.

Make some good memories for on down the line. Might even teach them a lesson or two while we are doing it. I hope anyway.

I went yesterday and took the Christmas stuff off of JT grave. Someone had put a candy cane in his stocking. It was a nice surprise. lol. Ok, it kinda freaked me out for a moment because I wasn’t expecting it but, it was really neat once I got over the shock.

But, well, I better get in gear and get off of here. I really want to get everything done today!

Tootles everyone!! And please have a greeeaaattttt day!!!

My long Christmas Weekend.

Well, my family came down. They never have before. My Aunt, My cousin Laurie and her hubby Mike and their 3 and 3/4 children. They are Austin 3, Autumn 2, and Ava-Lynne who is 11 months. She is also 8 months pregnant with their 4th. Then you add in my 4 plus the neighbor girl not the one with the mom who doesn’t do anything or who is extremely annoying but, the other one that is like family and I never know she is here. Her name is Asha. Then there was me and my hubby who is also Mike and a dog.

We had some good times and we had some bad times.

You see my Aunt did drugs for most of her life. She did it all weed, heroin, cocaine, alcohol, pills you name it. She has been sober for over 2 years. She is a completely different person. This new person is rather strange to me. She is for one very religious. Which is a good thing. She is clearer of mind but, very emotional. If anyone knows me they know I am one of those people that deals with stress by crackin joke after joke. And well, my Aunt’s sense of humor is Gone, Gone, Gone. It left her when the last of the drugs left her system. I actually made her cry a few times. I didn’t mean it didn’t realize that I had hurt her feelings. And i did this maybe 30-40 times a day.

But, on to other aspects, she told me so many stories of my mom and how she was when they were growing up. My mom passed away when I was 22 and even before then I didn’t really know her. That was great to hear. I have a picture of my mom standing beside some older guy never knew who he was. I found out who he was and that my mom was wearing my Aunt’s pants. Now, this was a black and white pic but, you could see the monstrosity of those pants. They looked like something Marcia brady would wear which makes sense because well, it was the early seventies when it was taken. My Aunt said, I bet you any amount of money that I was wearing this Orange hip hugger bells in that pic. She said they were her favorite pair. She was riding a bike in those pants and the legs got caught in the gears and rip them all the way up to her hip. Ok, this is the part that made her cry. I innocently said, “I bet you are glad you had underwear on right?” I get the whole speech from her about how could I talk about underwear they are to be worn not talked about that is why they are call unmentionables.
Seriously, she was supposed to laugh.

She also made her dressing while she was here and I still didn’t get to see how she made it. I cut up the celery and the onions and I still dont’ know what she does with that egg. Maybe next year.

The kids were great. I got to love all over the baby and that made my week. She is the happiest baby. You just look at her and she just explodes with her little smiles.

We read the bible story Christmas Eve night. This is a tradition for me and the girls we always do it. That made my Aunt happy. I think she thinks we are a bunch of heathens to tell you the truth. Kinda scary. Makes you take a look at yourself and say is there really something wrong with me? Do I not show that I love Jesus? I do but, she can be so critical sometimes.

But, you know the sad thing. Not really sad thing that was suppose to be a joke. I am so much like her it is just scary. I spent more time with her than I did with my mom and well, it shows. Just the things I say or some of the things I do. It all has her influence all over it. You know when you have that thing going I am never going to be like my mom. And then you do something and think oh man, it’s over I am just like her. Yeah, that! Well, I had that realization this week.

All in all, I will never forget this Christmas. We were given so much from others and it was totally unexpected. I don’t know how they knew we had a need but, what can I say Prayers were answered 10 fold. Thank you all.

Now, I must go do the dishes before the man gets home.

Ta ta folks.

I keep borrowing these from Elaine. lol. They are so much fun!


Your Holiday Personality is Caring


You like to reach out to people all year long, but you're especially giving during the holidays.
Make those you love homemade presents (like cookies or scarves). Call someone who might be feeling a little down. Give to your favorite charity.

I borrowed this from Elaine


Nope, You're Not a Grinch


Although you may feel Grinch-like at times, it's just because you're worn out from the holidays.
You get into the holiday spirit more than most people - and you truly enjoy celebrating with your family and friends.

I found this new series of books

It is the Stephanie Plum series by Janet Evanovich. She is a bounty hunter. Not a very good one but the stuff she gets into is ridiculously funny and terrifying at the same time. There is some terrible language in it but if you can get past that, the books are so entertaining.

I haven’t really done much these past days but, read. The series has 13 books and also 3 extra ones.

I have to say a thank you to my friends over at Homeschooling Moms. Because of them my kids will have a christmas. I love them so much. They have supported me through so much. I don’t know how to thank them enough. They are extra special extrodinary ladies. They have prayed with me, supported me, laughed with me, mourned with me, cried with me, and put up with me. Thank you so much for everything that you have done for us.

I don’t think I did any justice to that thank you. Just right now I can’t find the right words to thank them enough.

Hope everyone who reads this is doing great, may God bless you and keep you.

I borrowed this from Birdy


What kind of yarn are you?


You are Acrylic.While you are very versatile, your plasticky countenance can be offputting. You are very good with children but can become a pill if left alone with them too long. You are very flexible but don't give in to manipulation.
Take this quiz!


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