Rib Fest was Awesome!!! And I am not only talking about the ribs!

Oh my Goodness where do I start?? I guess from the beginning. That would be a good place huh?

I went to pick up Stacy after the Man got home from work. We stopped at the store then I had to run something back to the Man. We finally made it to the Cemetary and as I was getting out I noticed that my car was smoking. Stacey said that we better raise the hood because obviously it was hot and it sounded like it was bubbling. So, we did. My overflow tank was bubbling and hissing and spitting. I have never seen anything like it. I mean you could just see it bubbling. Like water boiling on a stove. I wasn’t even trying to be to concerned about it. I just figured we would let it cool down. We had planned to spend about an hour there anyway so, hopefully by then it would be cooled down.

We went and said hi to JT. Stacey brought a pinwheel to put on his grave. At first it wouldn’t go in the ground because the ground was to hard but, she worked it in there. We went to go look at the grave of another little boy whose headstone they had just put in. His name was Peyton, we found out. And he passed away a year after JT on the 16th of May a day before JT’s first Anniversary. We then went and sat down next to JT and we started talking and we told him we were staying for about an hour anyway he didn’t have to make the car bubbly. Just joking around. And also about how we never see other parents. I was going there daily for about the 1st 6 weeks and never did I see anyone else. We didn’t mean this in a bad way just an observation. We were just wondering when they snuck in around us and decorated the graves. Then we went to visit the other babies. We loved seeing that even after 50 years a lot of the babies still had people visiting them.

Stacy’s Granny’s family also has a baby in the baby section so we found him. His name is Johnny. He would have been around 40 years old. Granny decorates his grave also along with her family that is buried there across the way. As we were walking back, someone pulled up, it was a man. He got out of his van and went to visit a grave. He was visiting Peyton. As we were walking back to JT we felt really uncomfortable, because while we had never seen anyone here. We didn’t know what we would do in that situation. He walked right over to us and asked us which baby was ours. We showed him and he made us feel really comfortable. We talked for a long time. Just talking about our sons and how hard this thing called grief was.

This was a new thing for me. Besides grief group, I had not spoken to anyone who had just recently lost a child in Real life. I talk to mothers on the computer. I feel their pain by their writing. I sit and cry as I am reading. Standing face to face with a grieving father, the emotions were just churning inside of me. The hurt and the grief he never hid it. It was right there for everyone to see.

After he left, we realized, that on this day, the day that is all about JT for us. Our day alone that we don’t share with anyone else, something was orchestrated for a reason. It all fit together. The car overheating, our conversation, meeting another grieving parent. hmmm… wonder who did that one? lol

So, I had another first. I thought that I was done with firsts. But, obviously, God had something else in store for us.

I am in a different place then I was last year. I don’t have my doubts. I am not grasping at any and everything about where my son is. I know where he is. I know he is dancing at Jesus’ feet. My heart is at Peace. It has been for some time now.

It is so nice to have that one day a year with just Stacy. We shared an awesome thing when I let her into our lives and we shared JT. I couldn’t have done it without her. She was my other half. We worked really well together gathering info about his condition (s) and asking the hard questions. God knew what he was doing. And even though JT is with Jesus, we still have an awesome friendship. I was really scared after JT passed away that we would no longer have anything in common. That our friendship would just pass away also. But, it has just made our friendship stronger.

And for that I also thank God for. She has been there for me and if she ever needs me she knows I will be there for her too. No questions asked.

We went around the corner to the park. Ate some ribs, corn, mac n cheese and sat and listened to the jazz. We kept running from the sun because I am allergic to it. I self dianosed myself. lol. I just don’t like to be hot. We finally got a good shady seat up on the hill. The 8 o’clock band wasn’t as good as the man last year. Last year’s person was more entertaining and it lasted longer. But, we still enjoyed ourselves. After it was over, we sat and talked about JT and everything that had happened that day. It was very calming and nice after most of the people had left and the sun had went down. We enjoyed it and can’t wait until next year to do it again.

Sorry, I guess I had a lot to say, I hope that you made it through all of that. lol

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5 Responses

  1. Wow what a day. I always marvel at how God orchestrates the details of our lives. Your post really built my faith to see the Lord walking right beside you. Thanks for sharing this day with us.

  2. Oh Bobbie, i read this with tears in my eyes. I am so glad you met up with that grieving father. What a precious day you and Stacy (and JT) had together).

    Oh, and I am out of town and not used to typing on hubby’s laptop so i won’t send you a reply to your email for now. But just know I ALWAYS love hearing from you and you never come across too strong. I just love you!

    Thanks for being my friend and a wonderful support to me.

    HUGS…

  3. I am so glad you had a good day with Stacy. The Rib Fest sounds like a fun annual event that you share.
    It is amazing how God brings everything about.

  4. I love how God orchestrates things. To the non-believer, they’d call it coincidence, but we know better – don’t we?

  5. God has had His hand in your life from the get go….no coincidences here……Your pain and struggle has been an amazing testimony….as was and is JT’s little life….I still remember that day we arrived…….It will be forever etched in my heart how my children wanted to come and be supportive of you and JT and how you stood there comforting the boys….

    I am glad you have Stacy….she is a special angel God brought to your life……(((hugs )))

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