Which one?? *****UPDATE********


I really like the pic that I am going to post of Stacey. It shows her in a different light. She looks so calm and serene. And I just love pics were people are looking away looking thoughtful. Tell me which one you think is the best. I just made them different colors. I am going to blow up one of them to an 8×10 for her grandpa.

Here is the original.

Here it is with sepia tones.

Here she is in black & white.

i think this one is really good of Harley. My goodness it is hard to believe these almost grown children were once my babies.

Here is Ashley, she is growing up too fast. I might stick a weight on her head she is taller than me now! How do you go from 21 1/2 inches to 5ft 8in. in just 14 years?? and she is still growing!!!

Here is a pic of my baby girl with Megan, just to remind myself, I still have babies, that are under 4ft tall and that still love me and want to cuddle and have that little squeaky baby voice. The one that doesn’t pronounce all words right and that you laugh at because they are just soooooo cute!

Thanks for viewing them. Let me know which one of Stacey you would think would be the best one to give to grandpa. Thanks so much!

JT’s 2nd Birthday Celebration…… Pictures

Yesterday we went to the cemetary and celebrated Johnathan’s 2nd birthday. We had a good time, the kids played with cicadia bug shells. (how gross), We talked and had a good time. Here are some of the pics, most of these were done by the kids and they did a great job!

The cupcakes said Happy 2nd Bday JT but, the plastic kinda peeled it away.




A bunch of us



A cicadia shell on Stacey

Oh no!!! Look at Zac Efron’s nose, it grew a bug!!

The kids playin with the bugs. You would think girls wouldn’t do that but, Oh no, not ours!

More of us standing around talking.

Tune in tomorrow. I want to get opinions on a pic! Thanks for viewing I hope you enjoyed them.

August 29th Happy Birthday JT!!!!!

My Dearest Johnathan,

I miss you! Today is your birthday. I can’t believe it has been 2 years since you was born. It seems like just yesterday I was being rushed into that room to have that very scary emergency C-section. I was so scared. I remember telling the doctor to stop asking me questions and to just save my baby. And save you they did. I remember being wheeled on my stretcher into the NICU to see you. All I could see was your itty bitty little knee. Oh but, I fell in love with that knee. I could barely sleep that night even with all the medication that they had given me. Because I knew in a couple of hours that they would be coming to take me up to see you. Daddy of course fell asleep and was snoozing away. It was kinda funny because the first sight of daylight and he was getting everything in reach thrown at him to wake up. Ok, it was really funny and lots of fun.

When I finally did get to see you the next day I was truely and totally shocked at first. I could hardly find you with all the machines and plus there was all that humidity fogging up the incubator. But, we finally got to see you after several times of cleaning it off. And oh my goodness, I fell more in love with you. Let me tell you, if you could only know how much I loved you just from seeing your knee, the love that engulfed me when I seen you just hit me right in the heart.

You made it through some really big obstacles those first few days and the rest of your life. You was a fighter. I have never seen so much strength from anyone. And to imagine from an almost 2 lb baby the will to live was so strong that you knocked the socks off of those doctors and continued doing so the rest of your life. It is so amazing to me. I know God and the awesome prayer warriors we have had a lot to do with it. You were and still are awesome to me.

I have been having good days and bad days and the last few have not been so great. I have been thinking to much about the what if’s and I know that is not fair to you. You are really happy and whole with Jesus and I would never want to take that away from you. But, oh just to smell your hair after a bath again or to hold your hand and play with your little fingers, or just to see you look at me like you big dufus what were you thinking? I loved those times when we would ask you questions and you would answer. I think I loved that the most because it was like you really understood us. Like you knew we were crazy and that you were just amusing us with your awesome ability to be our magic 8 ball baby. More importantly in those times you knew I was your mommy and not just another person to come and take care of you.

I miss you Bubbas and I will continue to miss you. Time doesn’t heal that. It has taken some of the pain away. It isn’t as sharp as it once was. It still stabs me every once in a while for no reason what so ever. But, I welcome those times. They help me know that you were here you were my son. Not just a figment of my imagination.

I love you so much!!!!! We are having your birthday party at the cemetary at 4:15. No balloons this time but, I will be leaving you a cupcake.

Love you so much,


Dear Jesus,

Thank you so much for lending me JT. He was awesome and just what I needed. You gave me an awesome gift that I could never repay. The miracles you sent our way where life changing and awesome. The gift that you gave me has changed me oh so much. I don’t take my children for granite anymore, my faith is strong and my love of you has grown. JT made my life so full and wonderful. It was full of love, joy, sorrow, pain, frustration, grief. But, without our little man, I wouldn’t be who I am today. I wouldn’t trade it for anything and I know you knew what you was doing by sending him to me. I didn’t think you did at first but, now, as I look back, I know he was the son for me. Thank you thank you thank you so much.

Please give him a hug and a kiss for me.

with much love and gratitude and thanks,

Bobbie Poling

Pics for your viewing pleasure

Yesterday was Brittney’s birthday party. We had a lot of fun and had fun with the camera. Here are a few shots.

This is what she walked in to.

Here is the birthday girl.

Some of the food.

The next shots are still life’s or trash shots. lol
We were playing because well, we thought that we could make trash look good. Obviously, we don’t have that talent. lol but, it was fun!

Here is megan posing for us.

Megan and Mikayla swinging.

Isn’t my Ashley just so pretty when she smiles?

Brittney and her cake, High School Musical Rocks!!!

Just a glimpse at my bestest friend! Can you guess who??

I have more photos but, I will add more tomorrow, just gotta keep ya coming back for more. lol

Have a great day!!!

Stacey’s b-day party

It was a blast. She was so happy! We kept telling her she got an Elmo Princess cake because they were out of Hannah Montana. She was really happy when she seen it. I made her open her presents as soon as the last guest was there. I have that problem. I just couldn’t wait for her to see her presents. I have been waiting weeks for that. We ate, and talked, the girls’ grandpa played us some music. It was really nice. Stacey was supposed to have a slumber party, but, well, she got more than she expected. Between all of us there there were 12 1/2 kids. The parents migrated to the porch and there we stayed until 5:00 in the a.m. basically. I had children crashed all over my floor. and furniture and hanging off of my furniture. It was awesome! Everyone had an awesome time!

One of the guests said she has never had this much fun sober ever. The neighbors probably thought we were drunk with all the laughing going on but, nope, just some great fun!

I ended up getting like only 4 hours of sleep but, it was worth it.

Now, I am going to bed! Sleep well everyone!

Another blog

I have another blog here just thought I would let you all know. It is different from this one. So, check it out if you get the chance. Thanks!


We went to a back to school blow out yesterday at Southgate Baptist Church. It was awesome. Everything was free. We are talking food, games, inflatables, prizes, they had live worship music playing, and a puppet show. It was awesome. And they had many services available. They have a free clothing closet also that they do twice a month. They also have AWANA. I was in AWANA when I was a kid, but, that was in Toledo, and for some reason, I didn’t think that they had that here in Springfield. I am going to put Mikayla and Stacey in it. Stacey is really excited about it after I told her what they do. And I even got Brittney excited about it. She really wants to go too. Just giving you a heads up Stacy. lol.

I have been to that church before, about 13 years ago. I know Ashley wasn’t more than a year old when I went. I was really scared in there because it was so big and there were so many people. I like my little church. But, with gas prices so high and the fact that it is litterally right down the street from me, I am thinking of starting to go either there, or the seed church my church started right on the corner from me. It would make more sense to me to go to Southgate because of having the girls do AWANA there. I am not sure, I am going to pray about it. Be quiet and listen to what the Lord says about it.

But, I just wanted to tell you about my 2 1/2 hours of free fun last night. Oh yeah, they also got school supplies.

I actually had fun talking to people that I don’t know. I usually don’t like that sort of thing but, I was just a talking away to people and they were talking to me. I don’t know if I mentioned it but, talking to people I don’t know is way out of my comfort zone. We are talking panic attacks here. And I feel like I am breaking out in hives. And I am in no way blowing that out of porpotion. This last 14 months since JT passed away it has gotten worse. Like I will not go out of the house unless I absolutely have to. I used to take the kids to the park and let them play during the summer, or search out stuff to do that was either free or reasonably priced. I haven’t been able to do that. And oh my talking on the phone. Nope, that was really bad too. But, I just let myself relax and have at it and had a great time. I really need to force myself to get out more. I guess that will come with time. At least I hope so.

I usually just go to the stuff big Stacy goes to with me, so at least I have a buffer. But, this time she wasn’t going because she didn’t feel good and I struggled with telling the kids something like the car was broke or they cancelled it not to have to go, but, I didn’t and just jumped in and did it. And I am so glad I did. About an hour into it I called Stacy and told her all that they had going on and she decided to bring the kids. And she had a great time too. I was really relieved when I finally seen her and she showed up. But, I would have been alright if she hadn’t of, I was figuring out.

So, anyway there are my thoughts on the day and the events and myself. 😆