Figured it out….

Mikayla had messed with the computer when Ashley was watching her and that is what the problem was. I thought for sure the monitor was just about to go kaput! But, the hubster got on here and fixed it. Woo hoo yay!!!

I am feeling very melacholy. I can’t sleep again tonight and with that comes thinking. I think to much sometimes for my own good. I really deep down inside wanted a boy. And as I have been thinking and talking to God about it this early morning or late night. Something came to me. Bobbie, you really wanted to replace JT didn’t you? I stuggled with it for a couple of hours and denied it. Then I tried to shove it out of my mind. But, it just kept coming back to me. You wanted to replace JT.

Simple as that. I wanted a little boy who looked like him. With his fat little cheeks and goofy little expressions. That is what I really wanted.

Now, I know nothing or no one would ever or could ever replace JT. I think what I wanted wasn’t a replacement but, a son who could just look like him and give me the sense that I had one more little bit of time with my first son.

But, as I look back on the ultrasound, I realized that there was a huge sigh of relief when The tech said, it’s a girl. I felt alot of weight lifted off of me. And I contributed that to the fact that everything was ok, and she was perfect. There was nothing to cause complications. But, I didn’t feel that relief until she said, “It’s a girl”

Then as I was thinking and talking with God. I thanked Him, because you know he knows what is best for me. He knew that what I really needed. And He gave that to me. He looked deep into my heart and separated the wants and the needs and granted my needs. He always knows what I need. And for that I say thank you so much.

I know little Miss Victoria “Tori” Elizabeth is gonna give me a run for my money. Being the youngest of 5 girls. I can only imagine. If I go by how Mikayla acts and is loved on and gets away with stuff from her sisters and at the same time causes them headaches beyond belief. Whoa momma am I in trouble. But, it is a good trouble and one that I wouldn’t trade for the world.

I feel like Frank on Everybody Loves Raymond. I can’t wait to smell her head. Frank says it keeps him young, and I do believe that. Nothing is more sweeter than smelling babies heads. lol.

I can’t wait to see how much hair she has. With all the heartburn that I have had, it better be to her toes. But, most importantly, I can’t wait to bring her home. Safe, sound, fat and healthy.

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2 Responses

  1. Congratulations on the girl, Bobbie! I love the name.

    Isn’t it wonderful how our Heavenly Father gives us what we need and not just what we want? He is so good 🙂

  2. God is great!

    I am so happy for you.

    (Big hugs)

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